? ? ?

my head spins
faster faster
merry-go round goes
how fast can it go?
when will it stop?
stop these tears streaming down out of woe
all happiness drained
color ceases to stay
dwindling power proceeds a slow fading
the sun kills it
presence of you makes me sick
i can't cry you out
you damn demented light
keep burning my eyes
heat strangling my throat
breathing is shallower and shallower
through each moment's pass pain grows
nothing subsides
only my sanity
realizing this is no longer a free ride

how i wish you killed me when you had the chance
finished me off when everyone had their victory dance
here i am stuck in a world
too different for me to be alone for too long
fetal posing insecure withered being
i thought i changed
only the scenery changed
and here i am
stuck where i began
just as lost as before
i chase you as you set each night
when you rise i spring from my leg-hugging position
bask in your light while i can
then as you set, it all begins again.